It Ain't All Roses
by NickyK
Summary: A misunderstanding causes a rift between Jenny and Gibbs.
1. Chapter 1

Title: It Ain't All Roses

Author: NickyK

Disclaimer: Don't own any of them.

Summary: A misunderstanding causes a rift between Jenny and Gibbs.

A/N: I wrote this story while at work listening to one of my favorite artist, Mary J. Blige, which is also where the title of this story comes from. I do hope you enjoy (b/c it was written in just a couple of hours). Thanks in advance for reading. Now I'm off to finally read everything I've been missing!!

Chapter 1

Their voices were angry, though no one could really make out what they were saying. It didn't matter. The tone was enough to transcend the privacy of the Director's office and out to the bullpen where the staff cringed at every muffled word. Cynthia, the Director's assistant, who just happened to sit right outside the Director's office, bolted from her seat for fear that she would soon be scolded by the heated words flung between the Direct and her star agent, Jethro Gibbs.

His team, which consisted of Anthony 'Tony' DiNozzo, Timothy McGee and Ziva David, stared at each other in growing horror, each coming to the realization that this would not end well-for them or the parties inside that office.

"What the hell happened between yesterday and today?" Ziva hissed.

Tony flinched as their voices grew louder. "I don't know. I was just about to ask you that."

Everybody froze as the door opened and then slammed shut again.

"Uh…think we need Ducky?" asked McGee.

"It's alright, dear boy, I'm already here," said Dr. Mallard (Ducky) as he rounded the corner and stood in front of Tim's desk.

"Don't tell me you can hear them all the way in autopsy?" Tony asked, stunned.

"No…no. It's as quiet as a morgue down there," Ducky assured him. "It was Cynthia who alerted me. It seems she was quite certain that the two of them would end up killing each other." He turned his attention to the Director's door. "How long have they been at it?" he asked.

"At least half an hour, Ducky," said Ziva. "I'm surprise that Jenny has let this go on."

"Or that Gibbs hasn't stormed out of her office yet," muttered Tony.

"Indeed," Ducky agreed. He sighed, debating whether he should face the wrath of two of the most temperamental and stubborn people he knew or stay out of it and let the staff suffer a little longer. Of course, he knew something the others didn't; however, that was quickly going to change it they continued on the way they were.

"Wish me luck," said Ducky, starting toward the stairs.

"You're not going up there?" McGee asked incredulously.

Ducky shot him a look and continued on his way. The three of them stared at his back; each thinking of Ducky's bravery as he ascended the stairs.

He could hear them clearer now as he neared the door. He considered turning back; it just wasn't worth his life to step in between these two when they got like this. But he couldn't very well let them continue. They were at work after all. He turned the knob slowly, half hoping it was locked. It wasn't. He sighed in disappointment, slipping inside taking in the scene. They stood in front of her desk, anger radiating from them both, slinging words sharper than the tools he used to autopsy with. He cleared his throat to get their attention but it had no effect. Rolling his eye, he opened the door and slammed it hard. They both jumped, glaring at him as if they could tear him apart.

"Well, that's certainly more like it."

"What can I do for you Dr. Mallard?"

Director Shepard's voice was as cold as her eyes.

"You can lower your voices and remember where you are," Ducky told her unperturbed by her cool reception. "Do you both realize the entire office can hear you out there?"

"He started it."

"She started it."

They said in unison.

"What is this all about?" Ducky asked gently, still keeping vigil by the doorway.

"He's being pigheaded."

"She's being stubborn."

Both turned to glare at each other.

"He accused me of cheating," she told Ducky as if it were the most ludicrous thing she'd ever heard.

"She went out on a date," he shouted back, the words intended for Ducky but directed at the Director, "with a married man, no less."

"How many times do I have to tell you, it was not a date? You're being impossible about this and making something out of nothing."

Oh dear, thought Ducky, realizing he'd lost control of the conversation-if he'd ever had it.

"You're my wife," he shouted loudly. "I'm _supposed_ to make a big deal out of some man buying you flowers and inviting you to dinner."

"Say it a little louder, Jethro, I'm sure the rest of the world didn't hear it."

"Maybe I want them to!"

She stared wide-eyed at him. "Is that what this is about? Wanting to claim me?" she asked in disbelief.

Ducky watched as Jethro seemed to shrink before his very eyes. He stared at Jenny, chest still heaving from the angry exchange but his face was pained as he spoke to her. His voice was soft, barely above a whisper.

"Maybe it is, Jen. Maybe watching you flirt and dine with a man the way you did last night, a man who wasn't me, made me want to tell the world you're mine. Is that so bad?"

She opened her mouth to speak but he cut her off, his tone hardening once again.

"But maybe that's not what you want, huh Jen? Being somebody's wife takes you off the market, makes you unavailable, and makes you accountable. You want to flirt with Senators; use your womanly wiles to get your way, be my guest. But I'm not going to sit around and play the fool why you do," he spat at her, oblivious to the tears gathering in her eyes.

"You want out, Jen, just say the word."

A sob escaped her and she turned away.

Ducky stepped forward, fury written all over his face. "Not another word, Jethro," he warned the younger man. "Maybe you should go before you say something else you're going to regret."

Jethro looked at him and Ducky could see the regret already settling in. The damage; however, was done. He heard the Director's quiet sniffling behind him and knew it was only a matter of time before she built up her walls and buried her pain. Ducky needed to reach her before she did because if he didn't, it would be much harder to fix this.

Jethro tried to approach but Ducky shook his head.

_Not now_, he mouthed to the man as his own anger dispersed at the look of realization on Gibbs' face.

Gibbs nodded. He turned and walked out, the closing behind him with a final click.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you to all who have read reviewed! Hope you continue to read and enjoy!

Chapter 2

Ducky took a deep breath, turning his attention to the woman behind him. Her quiet sniffles had eased; the only noise coming from her direction was the shuffling of paper being moved back and forth across her desk. He watched her for a moment, not really sure what to say to her, not sure how to begin this conversation when he could already tell the walls were steadily being reinforced the longer they stood there.

"I'm fine, Dr. Mallard. You don't need to stay."

Ducky was startled to hear her speak. He had been almost certain that she'd forgotten he was even there. Of course, he should have known better-she was Jennifer Shepard, after all.

"Look me in the eye and tell me that," he commanded gently.

"I said I'm fine Ducky," she said as she moved from shuffling the loose papers to organizing the files on her desk, her back still to him.

Ducky sighed. What was he going to do with these two?

"Jennifer Shepard, turn to face me at once." His voice was firmer, louder and more authoritative. He would never dream of using that tone with the Director of NCIS; however, he had no such qualms about using it with the stubborn Mrs. Shepard-Gibbs. He beamed privately to himself when she turned, a look of surprise in her eyes.

He stepped forward, studying her a bit. Her eyes were still slightly red but other than that you couldn't tell anything was wrong. She stood up straight, shoulders back; her head held high- looking every inch the Director, erasing all traces of the woman whose heart was breaking.

"Talk to me, Jennifer."

"There's nothing to talk about."

Her voice was devoid of emotion, as if she were making some casual comment about the weather. And it scared Ducky.

"Don't bottle this up, my dear. You and Jethro, you need to fix this. You can't let whatever this is destroy what you and he have built."

That certainly made an impact. Her face crumbled, her shoulders slumped as she leaned heavily against her desk.

"I don't know what that is anymore."

Her voice was quiet and he had to strain to hear her. He moved a step closer. "What do you mean?"

She looked up at him and the turmoil in her eyes made him want to seek out Jethro Gibbs and give him several head slaps, or just down-right strangle him.

"I don't know what it is we've built, Ducky, if he doesn't trust me."

He reached for her then and was surprised when she came willingly in his arms.

"Jethro often times speak before he thinks when he's angry. You know he didn't mean it, Jennifer."

She swallowed back a sob, pulling away from him. He could tell she was embarrassed.

"I don't know that, Ducky."

"Jennif…,"

"No," she said shaking her head, swiping angrily at the tears that had begun to gather. "I can't do this. Not here."

"Jennifer, don't bury this."

"I'm not Ducky, I'm not. I just… I can't," she stopped, taking a deep breath before starting again. "I have the rest of the day to get through and I can't go around looking like a sniveling mess."

She moved around her desk, obviously looking for something. She came up with a mirror and her make-up bag. Ducky looked on in concern as she dabbed away the tears and re-applied her make-up. Fascination mixed with fear as he watched the transformation; fascination for the way she hid all outward signs of distress, a professional woman taking its place; fear that with the swipe of her brush she was trying to mask all the inward signs as well.

Once done, she put the items away and straightened, looking every inch the beautiful, confident woman she was. Ducky knew that if he pressed it wouldn't take very much to get her to deal with this now. The outward appearance was only but a façade that would crumple under strain. But he could not in good conscious ignore the pleading look in her eyes begging him to let it go for now.

So he did.

Recognizing the out he gave her, she smiled softly. "You were right about one thing Dr. Mallard. We are at the office and should have never let this get to the point where the staff had to call upon you to intervene. I apologize and will do so to them as well."

"I don't think an apology will be necessary, Director. They couldn't hear anything, just the tone of your voices," he assured her even though he knew she hadn't asked.

"I imagine that was bad enough," she said wryly.

"Well, Cynthia may be a bit scarred but everyone else I think will survive."

"I'll talk to her," she said briskly. "If there's nothing else I think I've wasted enough time this morning."

"Long as you understand, Jennifer, that we're not done here," he told her.

She heard the seriousness in his voice and nodded solemnly.

"I know. We'll talk…but later."

Ducky gave her one last long look before he reluctantly left her office.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: A heartfelt thank you to all who have read/reviewed. Here's the next part and I have to ask that if you see any errors please please forgive me for them. I rushed to get this up before I left work (I'm going to get in serious trouble one day) and didn't have time to do more than a cursory proof-reading of it. As always, I do hope you enjoy!

Chapter 3

The day passed without incident, much to Jenny's relief. She'd remained in her office with the door closed for most of the day, instructing her assistant that she was not to be disturbed unless it was an emergency. The talk with Cynthia had gone well, if a bit uncomfortable on Jenny's end. She'd managed to apologize without giving the topic of the argument away; despite the curiosity she could see brimming in the young woman's eyes. Cynthia assured her she understood and promised to keep visitors to a minimum. She'd been true to her word. Despite the numerous muted murmurings she could hear outside her closed door, no one bothered her. And for that, Jenny was extremely grateful.

She wasn't hiding. On the very few trips she'd made to MTAC she was blatantly aware that she and Jethro was the subject of many whispered conversations- if the silence that followed her was any indication. She could've kicked herself again for allowing them to have this argument here- not that she'd had much choice. It was, she decided, a lot less tense if she just stayed out of sight. She assumed that Gibbs must have taken refuge somewhere other than in the bullpen as well. She couldn't imagine anyone whispering about him while he was around, especially in the mood he was in when he'd left her office.

With thoughts of Gibbs came an overwhelming feeling of despair, settling over her like a cloak. She longed to see him, to make things right, to explain like she'd started to before he cut her off and started hurling accusations her way. She was used to seeing him several times throughout the day, maybe grabbing a quick bite to eat together if time allowed. When the team didn't have a case, she liked to just go outside her office and stand on the landing, observing him. It had always amazed her how he seemed to know she was there. He would turn in her direction and smile if he thought he could get away with it or give her that intense look that could make her melt right where she stood. Today, though, after this morning, there was nothing. She craved his touch and felt the loss of it deep down in her soul. It terrified her to think they she may lose the man who she loved more than life itself over a stupid misunderstanding.

_How could he possibly believe…?_

She stopped herself, refusing to play this game, refusing to feel guilty for something she hadn't done. For the rest of the morning and much of the afternoon, she'd managed not to think of him. It hadn't been easy, seeing that now that they were married, he was an integral part of her day. But now, as the day wound down and it was almost quitting time, he was naturally at the forefront of her mind. Just then her phone rang and with a concentrated effort Jenny pushed all thoughts of Jethro Gibbs out of her head.

The sun had long since slid to the other side of the world before Jenny decided it was safe enough to call it quits. She gathered up her things and left the solitude of her office to find her driver patiently waiting by Cynthia's desk. She smiled apologetically at him for making him stay so late. Jenny had tried to get him to leave, telling him she would be fine getting home by herself, but that idea had been firmly rejected.

The ride home had been quicker than she would have liked. Even though she'd missed his presence terribly today, Jenny wasn't sure she was ready to make amends just yet. He'd hurt her deeply with his accusations and that hurt was steadily becoming a physical ache. It did occur to her that he may still be just as angry with her as he was this morning. She braced herself as she entered their home.

Jenny needn't had worried. The house was dark, save one light left on in the foyer, and eerily quiet. Placing her briefcase on the stand by the door, she searched the house, frowning when she found it empty; a tinge of worry nibbling at the edges of her mind.

When they'd married, nearly 15 months ago, they had agreed to keep their separate residences. It worked to maintain the secrecy of their marriage and to keep their sanity. She and Gibbs were both strong-willed people and at times needed their own space. Jenny knew that some would think their arrangement strange, but it worked for them. For the most part, they lived in her home; it was larger and more secure than Gibbs' home was. It had been Gibbs' idea, surprisingly enough, or maybe not so much. Gibbs had always been more concern about her safety than she was.

Jenny went up to her room to change, deciding that she would wait up a while longer to see if he came home. She hated to go to bed angry and they did that way too often. She always had the thought in the back of her mind that one day they won't get the chance to say 'I'm sorry'. So she would wait for him, she decided heading to her study to pour herself a drink. They would talk, probably fight, but in the end they would work it out. She was confident of that.

That was until the night grew longer and the hands on the clock ticked on, hour after hour and still no sign of him. A call to his cell phone proved to be pointless as his voicemail clicked on. Her worry increased and she grabbed her keys and headed out the door before she even thought about what she was doing. It was the fact that it took her several tries to fit the key into the car door that clued her in that maybe she'd had one drink too many. She stopped, closed her eyes and took a deep breath before heading toward the security car parked across the street. He didn't question her as she requested to be driven by Agent Gibbs house. He silently opened the door for her, making sure she was secure before pulling away.

Gibbs' house was deserted, showing no signs that he'd been there recently. Her lips thinned as she fought the urge to cry, her worry increasing as she again got his voicemail. It wasn't like him not to answer her calls and she could only imagine the worse. But then she stopped cold in her tracks, wondering if he'd done what he thought she had; found comfort in the arms of another.

Jenny stumbled out of the house, dazed by the thought. She bypassed the car and turned down the street, needing the movement. She couldn't think, could barely see pass the tears clouding her vision and almost fell on an uneven piece of concrete. She kept walking, not sure where she was headed, until her driver convinced her to get in the car.

She didn't want to go home but knew she couldn't sit in the car all night either. So she had the driver take her to the one other place she felt she could go.

A dim light was burning in the window as the pulled up outside the 2-story brick home. She got out of the car, shaking her head as the driver began to exit with her, and made quick strides to the door. She rang the bell and waited, hoping that the light had been his and he was still awake.

The door opened hesitantly as she saw someone peak the window. Ducky stood there, dressed in his pajamas and a robe but didn't look like he'd been sleeping. He stared at her in surprise as he stepped out onto the porch.

"Director Shepard?"

It took two tries before she could speak, swallowing hard to get the words past the lump in her throat.

"I can't find him, Ducky," she said brokenly, her voice barely above a whisper.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thank you all for reading/reviewing. As always it is much appreciated it. Please enjoy!

Chapter 4

Tony DiNozzo was a very happy man, and with the right amount of charm he could soon find himself on the way to becoming a very _satisfied _one. He signaled the waiter to bring another round of drinks as he moved closer to the drop dead gorgeous brunette currently running her bare feet up his leg under the table. The _come-hither _smile on her face as she steadily moved her hand up his thigh made shelling out the two hundred plus bucks on the expensive champagne totally worth it, he thought. Tony leaned forward, wrapping a strand of dark hair around his finger, breathing in her sweet perfume. Just as he was about to suggest that they take this party somewhere a little more private, like back to his place, when Tony felt _shaking _between them. He frowned as his lust filled brain tried to decipher exactly where it was coming from. His companion smiled at him.

"I think you're ringing," she said seductively.

Tony cringed wondering if he could get away with dropping the irritating little mood interrupter in his glass of water; seeing how it was agency issue, he didn't think so. He dug the phone out of his pocket, groaning at the name on the display screen. Putting up his finger to signal his companion he'd only be a moment, he flipped the phone open and pushed the button to talk.

"This had better be good, Ducky."

"I'm afraid I can't deliver on that one, my boy," Ducky replied.

Tony sat up straight, hearing the weariness in the older man's voice. "What's up, Duck?"

"I need you to find Agent Gibbs, Tony. Sooner rather than later."

"Find him? Is he missing?" Tony said frowning. "Have you tried his cell phone?"

"Indeed I have. And so has the Director. Several times I might add. He's not picking up. Nor is he at home; its been checked."

"The Director is looking for Gibbs?" Tony asked confused. "It's not like Gibbs not to answer his phone. Especially for the Director."

"Which is why I want you to find him Tony."

"Right, I'm on it," Tony said, his mind already switching gears. "What do I do when I find him, assuming he's alright, of course?"

He could hear Ducky hesitate a moment before the doctor replied. "Bring him here."

"Ok." Tony didn't question it; whatever was going on didn't concern him tonight. But there was one thing he did need to know. "Ducky, is the Director alright?" he asked carefully thinking back to the fight between the Director and Gibbs earlier that day.

Ducky's voice was just as careful as he answered. "Let's just say the Director is very concerned."

Tony took that to mean that the Director probably hadn't spoken with Gibbs since he'd stormed out of her office and was afraid something had happened to him. Tony turned to his date, smiling apologetically as he rose from the table, pulling out his wallet .

"Look Nadine, I-"

"Nadia," she corrected.

Tony stopped, puzzled for a second. "Oh. Uh. Right. Nadia. Look Nadia, I'm sorry to end this so abruptly but I've got to go, work and all," he explained as he threw some cash on the table. "Maybe we can get together some other time?" he asked hopefully.

"Yeah, maybe," she said as she got up from the table as well. She bent over, using her lipstick to write her number on the napkin and Tony didn't wasn't any time checking out her ample backside. He bite back a moan. He was going to so kill Ducky. She handed him the napkin, leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek close to his mouth, whispering the words "call me" in his ear before sauntering away.

Tony watched her go, biting his fist in a show of frustration before turning his mind to the problem at hand. Once outside, he reached for his phone once again, first he dialed Gibbs' number, not surprised when he too got his voice mail. Tony hung up and searched for another number.

"If I can't have any fun tonight," he said mumbling to himself as he found the number he was looking for, "neither can McGeek." Tony pushed the button and waited.

After several rings, McGee's groggy voice came on the line.

"Hello?"

McGeek, Tony here. You're not busy are ya?"

"Tony? Do you know what time it is?"

"Of course I know what time it is, McGeek. The question is, why are you in bed this early?" asked Tony bewildered by the thought.

"Tony, it's 2:30 in the morning. What do you want?"

"Gibbs has gone off radar. I need you to see if you can tract down his phone."

"Gibbs is missing?" McGee repeated.

"McGeek, wake up and pay attention," Tony yelled into the phone. "Can you track his phone from your place or do you need a lift to NCIS."

"No…uh…I can do it from here," said McGee, his voice still groggy from sleep. "Have you tried calling his cell phone."

Tony gasped into the phone. "McGee, you're a genius. Why didn't I think of that?" Tony said sarcastically. "Of course I tried his phone, no answer, goes straight to voice mail."

"Well, it is kinda late, how do you know he's not just home resting? How do you know he's missing?"

"I got it from Ducky who got it from the Director that something's amiss. Now, are we done playing twenty questions because I really need that location McGee."

"I'm on it, give me a sec."

Tony reached his car and climbed inside to await the information from McGee as to Gibbs' possible whereabouts. He could hear tapping noises through the phone and knew McGee was at his computer or whatever he used to track down signals or bleeps or whatever else the McGeeks of the world called it. Tony didn't really care how he did it, he just wanted it done and soon. Because the sooner he could find Gibbs' and make sure there was no foul play, the sooner he could use the number on the napkin tucked securely inside his pocket.

"Got it Tony. I'm sending it to your GPS," said McGee. "Are you going to need backup?"

"I don't think so McGee," said Tony as he started his car and pulled out into the nearly deserted road. "I know this area. I don't think there's anything to worry about. Go back to sleep, Probie. And thanks."

Nearly twenty minutes later, Tony found himself cruising down the street of the coordinates McGee gave him. For a moment he thought he'd had it wrong. The street was quiet, the bar that Tony had recognize from the information McGee had given him as one of Gibbs' secret hangouts, was closed up tight. He frowned, his worry increasing as he saw no signs of Gibbs and he began to wonder if maybe foul play had been involved in his disappearance after all.

Tony lifted his phone and was about to call-in for backup when he spotted him. Or his car rather. But it was the slight movement that Tony could see inside that made him pause and drive a little closer. Sure enough, Gibbs sat in his darkened car, looking straight ahead, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. After honking his horn at the older man didn't provoke a response, Tony pulled over to the side. He got out and walked to Gibb's car, bending down to peak in the window, knocking when he saw there was nothing to worry about.

He heard the faint click as the doors unlocked. Gibbs still didn't look at him as he sat down in the passenger seat. Tony remained quiet for a moment, taken aback by the strong scent of alcohol hovering in the air. When the silence began to feel uncomfortable and turned towards Gibbs, sighing inwardly.

"There a reason you sitting here in the dark, Boss?"

Gibbs shrugged. "Had a little too much too drink; didn't think I should be driving so I gave my keys to the bartender. Told him I'd get them tomorrow."

Tony nodded. "Sounds smart." was all he could think of to say.

The silence stretched once again as Gibbs' stared out the window and Tony wondered what in the world was going on.

"Why you here, DiNozzo?" asked Gibbs, finally breaking the silence.

"You've got some people looking for ya. I was sent to find you and deliver you to Ducky's," answered Tony. "Feel like taking a ride with me?"

Again Gibbs was quiet and Tony fought the urge to fill up the silence with useless chatter. He started when Gibbs opened his door and looked over at Tony.

"Well, you coming?" he said and Tony scrambled out of the car, racing over to his own, waiting until Gibbs' settled in before heading toward Ducky's.

The ride over with him and Gibbs was a quiet one. Tony hadn't been able to keep from trying to make conversation while driving but one look from Gibbs had him shutting up real quick. As he pulled up to Ducky's house, Tony was slightly surprised to see the black stretch limo parked out front. He knew that the Director had contacted Ducky but he'd thought via phone, not a personal visit. He and Gibbs got out of the car and walked up to the door. Tony reached out his hand to knock and the door swung open a bit. He stepped inside and Gibbs followed.

They'd stepped into a large kitchen area and Tony thought seeing the Director of NCIS in the arms of the resident doctor, wearing his flannel pj's and matching robe, was quite humorous. But hearing the harsh words that came out of his Boss's mouth stunned him into speechlessness.

"What, she sleeping with you too now, Ducky?"

The resounding slap resonated around the room, making the other two flinch in sympathy and wish they were anywhere but there.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Again many thank you's to those who have read/reviewed. I apologize for the slightly longer than usual wait. I struggled with this chapter and I'm still not 100 satisfied with it but hopefully the end result will be acceptable. As always, I hope you enjoy!

Chapter 5

She stood before him, her entire body wound tight with rage, the emotion radiating off her in waves. Her eyes were dark with fury; her hands clenching and unclenching at her side as if she couldn't decide whether or not have another go at his face. Her own face was flushed, her chest heaving with each angry breath she took.

"How dare you!"

Her voice was scathingly quiet. Gibbs had the distinct impression that if she thought she could get away with murder, he'd be dead by now. He reached for her, not sure why and not at all surprised when she backed away from him.

"Don't. You. Dare. Touch. Me." Each word fell like shards of glass, sharp and dangerous, and delivered with the appropriate amount of disdain thrown in for good measure. "How could you do this? How can you come in here, in his home and insult him like that? Not to mention me! What the hell is the matter with you, Jethro?"

It occurred to Gibbs that the alcohol that had kept him from driving tonight may also be what was affecting his inability to keep his mouth shut. Part of him knew she was right and his comment was way out of line. Ducky didn't deserve it and truthfully neither did Jen. But the other part him, the part that was just as stubborn as she was, the part that couldn't get the image of her laughing and flirting with another man out of his head, really didn't give a damn.

"What's the matter with me?" He laughed derisively. "That's a good question. What _is_ the matter with me, Jen? Huh? Am I not doing it for you anymore?" He glared at her, nostrils flaring, torn between shaking her senseless or dragging her home to show her just how good they still were together. "What's so horrible, Jen, about being my wife that you have to seek the company of another man?"

The shocked gasped behind him alerted him to the fact that DiNozzo was still there, listening and witnessing it all. The look on Jenny's face told him she also just realized they still had an audience. He watched as she tried to reign in her temper, turning away from him to face the other two in the room.

"Tony, Ducky…you shouldn't be in the middle of this. I'm sorry," she told them. "Thank you Tony, for finding him. I'm sorry that we disrupted your evening."

Gibbs was always amazed at how she could be angry one minute and be courteous and professional the next. Usually he found it amusing; now it was just one more thing to grate on his nerves and he snorted.

Jenny ignored him as she continued, addressing Tony more so than Ducky. "I have only one request, though, and that is to respect our privacy and keep what you've _seen_ and heard here tonight to yourself."

"Of course, Director," Tony muttered and Gibbs thought he heard a bit of admiration in the young man's voice. Perhaps he too was surprised at how quickly her emotions came and went.

She walked over to Ducky, grabbing his hand. "I'm going to go home Ducky," she said and Gibbs could have sworn he heard tears in her voice. "I don't think it's a good idea for him to follow me."

"Don't worry, my dear, I'll keep him here for the night. Do you need Anthony to escort you home?"

She shook her head, turning to face Gibbs, greens eyes staring disappointedly into his own. "No, my driver is still outside. I don't want to be accused of sleeping with yet another one of my employees."

The dig stung as it was meant too. He realized that now would probably be a good time to apologize, at least for the comment about her and Ducky. As she made to go passed him, he caught her arm and felt her tense. She stared straight ahead, refusing to look at him.

"I didn't mean it, Jen. Tonight…you and Ducky…I didn't mean it," he said, his voice thick as he leaned in close so only she could hear him.

She turned to him then, their faces inches apart, their breath mingling together in the small space between them. Her eyes searched his, and he could see the misery in them before she looked away. Her fingers were cold as they closed around his hand, removing it from her arm; yet she didn't move away.

Her voice was curiously tender as she said, "You still don't trust me, do you Jethro? When you look at me, you still feel betrayed."

It wasn't a question so he didn't answer. He really didn't have too. He was positive she'd seen it written plainly all over his face; his doubts, his uncertainty.

"Jen…"his voice trailed off, not really sure what he'd wanted to say.

She raised her eyes up to his and he could see the anguish in them, the despair. He wanted to take it all away but the words 'I'm sorry' stuck in his throat.

"You asked me what was so horrible about being your wife that I would turn to another man." She chuckled quietly as if it was the most absurd question she'd ever been asked. "The truth is, Jethro, nothing about being your wife is horrible. Becoming your wife was one of the best things to happen to me in a very long time. I love you and only you, Jethro. But," she continued her voice still soft and low, almost vulnerable as her eyes sparkled with tears, "it makes me wonder what kind of marriage we have? What does it say about me…about us…that would make it so easy for you to stop trusting me?"

And with that said, she turned and walked out the door.


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Finally...an update! First, thanks to everyone who has read/reviewed. Second, I apologize for the long wait (again) but here's a short chapter to move the story along. I make no promises as to the next update but I will say I'm working on it! As always...I hope you enjoy!

Chapter 6

An awkward silence surrounded the three men as Jenny walked out the door. It hung heavy in the air like a hovering cloud of doom. Tony remained still against the counter in which he leaned, observing Gibbs as he watched the Director's car until the taillights faded from view. He swallowed a sigh, wishing he was somewhere else instead of inside the oppressive atmosphere looming in Ducky's home, made worse by the raw pain exuding from the man he called his Boss.

Both Gibbs and the Director were private people. So it was with absolute horror that he realized that he was in the perfect position to see and hear what he knew was meant to be a personal conversation just between the two of them. It was an emotional moment; he could hear the tears in Jenny's voice. Tony tried not to listen but he honestly couldn't help it. He didn't dare move. The last thing he wanted to do was draw attention to himself, though Tony was certain that neither of them had forgotten that they weren't alone.

He'd always respected Gibbs, admired him even. He was a pretty decent boss and an even better agent. But right now as the sorrow in the Director's voice reached his ears and the wounded look on her face made him want to offer her his own form of comfort, Tony felt nothing but pity for the man.

He watched as Gibbs suddenly turned from the doorway and faced Ducky, looking decidedly uncomfortable.

"Duck...," Gibbs began, "about what I said earlier…"

He trailed off and Tony wondered idly if the reason for the Boss's rule about apologies being a sign of weakness was simply because he found them difficult to do. In the end, it didn't matter. Ducky waved away his words.

"Don't bother, Jethro," the old man chided kindly, "I'll just chalk it up to the alcohol. This time," he warned with a pointed look at Gibbs.

It was a generous thing for him to do, Tony mused, considering Ducky had every right to kick Gibbs out on his butt.

"In the meantime" Ducky continued, "it looks like you're going to be needing a place to sleep. I'll just go on and get the guest bedroom ready for you. It's a good thing mother is away on her retreat. All this excitement would have had her up for hours," he said mumbling to himself as he shuffled out of the room.

With Ducky out of the room, the silence seemed even thicker and Tony wondered, again, why he was still here? He considered leaving then as Gibbs turned back to stare out into the darkness. He'd done his part; there was really no good reason for him to stay. Getting in the middle of whatever was going on between his boss and his boss's boss was not the way to spend his evening and was way too complicated for him, for sure. He felt for them though. After waging bet after bet on the pair, to finally be able to say "I told you so" about them, it was a big disappointment to see the relationship crumbling before his very eyes. Tony realized he _wanted_ them to patch things up. _Needed _them too. Because despite everything, the two of them were better together than apart. And somehow he had to make Gibbs see that too.

Tony jumped as the silence was abruptly shattered by Gibbs' vehement curse as he hit his fist against the frame of the door, frustration mixed with pain featured across his face. Tony winced, knowing the assault had to hurt.

"Might want to have Ducky take a look at that," Tony said, nodding at his hand.

"It'll be fine," mumbled a disgruntled Gibbs as he as sat down at the table.

Tony took a breath; it was now or never. "You were pretty tough on the Director tonight."

"You think?" Gibbs snapped, then turned and glared at Tony. "Why are you still here, DiNozzo?"

"Just making sure you're okay, Boss."

Gibbs snorted but said nothing.

His silence, however, didn't dissuade the younger agent from abandoning his post against the counter and joining him at the table. He pulled out a chair, straddling it as he faced Gibbs. "So, you really think the Director's stepping out on you?" he asked nonchalantly.

Gibbs scowled. "And how is any of this your business?"

Tony shrugged. "Just find it hard to believe, that's all."

"I know what I saw."

The fiercly whispered comment surprised Tony. Knowing his Boss's penchant for checking and double checking the facts it seemed out of place coming from him.

"Sometimes what you think you see is not always the case," Tony said quietly.

Gibbs voice was deceptively calm as he stared hard at Tony. "You got a point, DiNozzo?"

Tony leaned forward in his chair, his voice oddly sincere as he spoke. "I don't know everything that's going on and I really don't need to know. I did hear enough tonight to put at least a few of the pieces together and I have to tell ya, Boss, that if you honestly believe the woman who left here tonight is capable of doing what you're accusing her of doing, you're a fool."

Gibbs didn't reply but Tony could tell by the tightening of his jaw that he was at least listening. Or getting ready to head slap him or worse. It was too late to stop now, thought Tony.

"The woman who left here tonight, Boss, was not a woman feeling guilty for cheating on her husband. That was a woman in agony. She's hurting bad, Boss and you need to fix this."

"Arrrrgh, Tony," Gibbs said as he rubbed his hand over his face. "It's not that simple."

"Maybe not," the younger man conceded, "or maybe it is. You know me, Boss, I don't do long term relationships and I'm not the best one to take advice from either. But I do know that a relationship is built on trust and without it, there is no relationship." He was silent for a moment before adding. "Director Shepard is a beautiful woman. She's smart, she's classy and frankly I think you're lucky to have her. Don't let this become divorce number five, Boss. " Tony said sadly. "You _have_ to fix this."


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thank you everyone who has read/reviewed this story. I valued each review and its wonderful to know you guys are enjoying this story as much as I enjoy writing it! I do hope you continue to enjoy and I will try to update again as quickly as possible.

Chapter 7

A sliver of moonlight shone through the bedroom window casting shadows against the walls. A lone star could be seen twinkling in the distance and Jenny wondered if it felt as alone and abandoned as she did right then. Wrapping her arms around herself, she leaned her forehead against the cool surface of the window, willing the tears not to come. She'd done enough crying. She was tired, so very tired; yet sleep continued to elude her.

She missed Jethro. Missed the way he smiled at her, the way he looked at her. She missed hearing him breathing next to her as the gentle thumping of his heartbeat lulled her to sleep. She missed having his warm body curled around hers as she slept; missed his gruff voice in her ear as he stroked her awake in the mornings. She missed it all. And she was terrified to think that she may not get any of it back.

Work had been pure torture, at least for her. Jethro avoided her whenever possible, would barely even look her in the eye. All interaction about his case came through his team. Any questions she had about the reports were met with either shoulder shrugs or abrupt answers that left her feeling slighted. Thank God for small emergencies as she was called into MTAC and had remained there pretty much for the rest of the day. She was surprised however to find Tony waiting outside her office when she'd finally emerged.

She hadn't welcomed his visit, no more than she'd welcomed Ducky's when he'd come by to inquire about her well-being. She didn't want their pity and cursed Jethro for putting her in the position where they felt they needed to offer it.

She led him inside her office, leaving the door open as she turned to him. "Can I help you with something Agent DiNozzo?"

"I just wanted to give you my report ma'am," he said handing it over to her.

Jenny raised her brow. "In person, Tony? You could have left this on Cynthia's desk," she told him, knowingly.

Tony dipped his head sheepishly. "Well, I also wanted to see how you were holding up?"

"I'm fine."

He gave her a dubious look.

"Okay, I will be fine," she amended with a faint smile.

Tony nodded, still not looking convinced, but not about to push the issue. He turned to go then stopped, turning back to her. "Look Director, I know this is none of my business and I know you and I have had our differences but I just wanted you to know that I think the way Gibbs is treating you is wrong. He's making a mistake and it's only a matter of time before he realizes what a jerk he's being."

Despite the awkwardness of the situation, Jenny was grateful for his support. She blinked back tears as she reached out to grab the young man's hand. "Thank you, Tony. I know you were unwittingly put in the middle of this and I apologize again for that. But I do appreciate your words and I hope you're right."

He'd squeezed her hand then and left before the moment became too weird for both of them. After making sure that she'd not left anything urgent in her escape to MTAC, Jenny packed up her things and headed home, achingly aware of the absence of the deep timbre man who usually accompanied her.

Jenny turned away from the window, her eyes falling to the clock on the side of her bed. Already passed two in the morning and she knew that her mind was no where near settled enough to allow her to sleep. She grabbed her robe and made her way downstairs to her study. Maybe work would help, or a stiff drink. Right now she would do anything to take her mind off her current situation.

The house was dark and Jenny didn't bother turning on a light until she reached her study. Going behind the desk, she flipped on the lamp, its dim lighting illuminating the desk and no further. She didn't need the light to know where to find the liquor she'd kept stored there. She poured herself a drink, pausing before she took a long gulp of the liquid, enjoying the way it slid down her throat before returning to her desk.

Jenny had been an agent too long not to trust her instincts. Becoming Director of NCIS only strengthened her intuition, not lessen it. Many believed because she was no longer in the field, no longer doing active investigation that her senses were weak and reflexes slow. Many would underestimate her and believe that as she leaned forward to reach into her drawer she might be looking for something other than a weapon.

But one person knew her better than that and as her hand wrapped around her 9mm, a body pressed up against hers, his hand covering hers, stilling the moment when she would have retrieved it out of the drawer.

"You might _want_ to do that, Jen," he said from behind her, "but I'm asking you not too."


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thanks again to everyone who has read/reviewed and basically sticking with this story! Please enjoy!

Chapter 8

Jenny released the weapon and closed her eyes, trying to stifle the hope that had risen inside of her at the sound of his voice. She straightened and leaned back, enjoying the feel of his hard body against her own. She started as she felt his hands slide around her waist, pulling her more securely against him. Her thoughts were a jumbled mess as confusion and relief flooded her senses, making her head spin. She'd missed the contact too much and it just felt too good to be near him again for her to move away just yet.

"I've missed you, Jen."

His voice was ragged in her ear, the words uttered with a tinge of desperation. He nuzzled his face in her hair; she could feel him breathing in the scent of it. Something she knew he liked to do. It was as if these last few days had never happened; like the heartache and pain she'd experienced were a figment of her imagination. And as his hands splayed possessively across her stomach while he planted soft kisses along the back of her neck, her body reacting to his touch, she could almost forget the reasons behind it all.

_Almost._

But the pain and hurt she'd felt at the distrust in his eyes hadn't been just something she'd imagined. It was real; she'd felt it night and day since the whole ordeal began and she couldn't just pretend that everything was okay. Because it wasn't. Far from it actually and they had to deal with it or it would destroy what little there was left of their marriage.

Drawing on those emotions, she untangled herself from his arms. It was harder than she'd thought it would be. She didn't expect him to resist, to tighten his hold on her. How easy it would be to bury herself in him. But, she reminded herself sternly, she didn't cause this rift between them; he did. And to pretend like nothing had ever happened, like the anger and distrust between them didn't exist, well, that was wishful thinking.

Anger welled up inside of her and she welcomed it; rejoiced in it. Anger was good. She needed it. Because without it she would fall apart. Jenny peeled his fingers from her body and stepped away from him. Allowing the anger to strengthen her resolve, she faced him.

It was hard to see him clearly but the dim lighting made him look haggard. He hadn't shaved and his hair looked as if he'd been constantly running his hand through it. Jenny walked over to flip on the light switch, brightening up the room considerably but not blindingly so. His face was guarded as she stood before and was pretty sure the look was mirrored on her own.

"What are you doing here, Jethro?"

He shrugged. "Couldn't sleep," he replied, his voice low.

"Oh. So you thought sneaking up on me in the middle of the night was a good idea because…?" She let the question trail off, waiting for his answer.

"I didn't sneak upon you, Jen. I thought you'd be asleep."

"Right. Because sleep has been coming so easy to me lately. Being alone and all."

There was no mistaking the sarcasm in her voice, nor the hard look in her eyes.

"I needed to see you, Jen."

"Why?" she asked, her voice taking on a hard edge. "So you could make sure that I was truly alone?" She shook her head in annoyance. "Look, if you're here to haul more accusations my way, you can just leave. I've had enough and I'm done trying to make you understand…"

"That's not why I'm here," he said interrupting her.

"Then why?"

"I'm here because I missed you."

"You missed me?" she repeated as if the words left a bad taste in her mouth. "You're kidding me right? I mean, c'mon Jethro, you've spent the last two days accusing me of cheating on you, refusing to look at me, barely speaking to me and now you're here, in the middle of the night because all of a sudden you miss me! Get real!" her voice rose with each word, her movements jerky as she paced the length of the floor.

"Jen, I know it was unfair…"

"Unfair?" she echoed him as she stopped in her tracks, her eyes flashing with anger as she swirled about to face him. "Unfair, Jethro? You've been down right cruel."

"Let me explain…"

"Ha," she exclaimed bitterly, noting the look of irritation cross his face as she interrupted him once again. "the same way you let me explain when you came to me about Senator McAfee?" she questioned. Her temper was at its boiling point. Her body shook with rage as she stepped closer to him, her tone nasty as she continued. "But wait, you didn't let me explain, did you? You barely let me get a word in edgewise as you flung your accusations at me. You took one look and thought the worst," she chuckled humorlessly as she shook her head at him. "God, Jethro, you basically treated me like I was a whore."

"I never thought that," he said roughly as he reached for her.

She ducked his arms, waving her own wildly as she continued. "I _know _what you thought. You saw me having dinner with another man, laughing and enjoying myself and you thought that automatically meant I was sleeping with him. You saw me in the arms of one of our very dear friends, I mean, he was the witness at our wedding for goodness sake, and the first words out of your mouth are, am I sleeping with him too! How dare you," she yelled, as the hot bitter tears slid down her cheeks. She stepped close to him again, her forefinger poking him in his chest, as she spoke. "How dare you do this to me? To us. I would never do something like that to you, I would never cheat on you. You should know that! How could you believe I would do something like that? How, Jethro? How?" Her voice cracked as she pounded his chest with her fists; her silent tears having turned into outright sobs as all the hurt and anger rose to the surface.

Gibbs wrapped his arms around her as her legs gave way and they sank to the floor. Jenny curled her fingers into his shirt as deep gut-wrenching sobs tore at her, she hated every second of it but couldn't seem to stop. He tightened his hold on her, whispering incoherent words in her ear as she cried.

After a while her sobs lessened as they turned into quiet hiccups. Neither of them spoke as they sat there on the floor. Jenny uncurled her fingers from his shirt, absently smoothing it down. Her voice was barely audible as she spoke. "I can't take much more of this Jethro. It hurts too much."

He kissed the top of her head, her lips lingering for a moment, but he said nothing. Jenny pushed out of his arms, needing to see him, to know what he was thinking. She was surprised and more than a little frightened to see tears tracks on his face. She swallowed hard as she stared into his blue eyes, not recognizing the look in them. Shakily she reached out a hand and gently wiped away his tears, only to have him grab it and turn it over so that her palm rested against his lips. Her eyes closed as a familiar tingle raced up her arm, only to open quickly as she heard his sharp intake of breath.

He was studying her face again, his eyes intense as they traveled over her. Still holding her hand in his, he lifted his other to trace the path his eyes had taken and a sense of foreboding stole over Jenny as she got the distinct impression that he was doing it for the last time. Her pulse sped up and her lips thinned as she fought back another onslaught of tears. She absolutely refused to cry again.

But she couldn't help the fear taking root inside of her, nor could she stop the trembling of her lips or hide the quiver in her voice as she asked the question that seemed to hang between them like a death sentence.

"Is it over?"


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: As always thank you to those who have read/reviewed. It is very much appreciated. I'm hoping to have this wrapped up in one more chapter. I would have ended it with this one but it would have been too long, I think. Thx again for sticking with me...the end is near! I do hope you enjoy this chapter!

Chapter 9

_Is it over?_

The question hung between them, mocking them with its simplicity - either its yes or its no- both knowing there was nothing simple about what they faced. Jenny waited with baited breath as Jethro lifted his hand and brushed the hair out of her face, his fingers grazing her cheek.

"Do you want it to be over, Jen?"

Again, a one word answer would suffice, but it just wasn't that easy. Jenny didn't want to be the one to answer that question. Didn't want to pressure him into staying married to her if he honestly didn't believe he could trust her. As devastating as it would be to lose him, staying in a marriage devoid of trust would be even worse.

Suddenly exhausted, she heaved a sigh. The lack of sleep, the worrying, the stress all came crashing down on her and all she wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep until it all went away. She would never consider herself to be a coward; preferring to confront things head on, push until she got things resolved one way or the another. But right now as her head began to pound and darkness touched the edge of her vision, all she wanted to do was escape. She tried shoving away from him but found the effort to be too much as her body swayed against him.

"Hey, you okay?"

She could hear the concern in his voice but couldn't gather her thoughts enough to answer him. Jenny shook her head, trying to clear the dizziness she was feeling but that only seemed to make it worse.

"Jen?"

His tone was more urgent now and she could hear the almost panic in his tone. Jenny swallowed hard and concentrated on getting the words past her lips. "I'm fine, Jethro. I think I just need to…uhm…get up," she said but the words didn't sound convincing to her own ears.

"Here, let me help you," offered Gibbs as he levered himself against the wall, reaching down to place his hands underneath her arms, effectively pulling her against the him. He kept his arms around her, making sure she was steady on her feet.

"I'm okay. I think my sleepless nights are catching up to me, that's all."

Guilt flushed across his face. "When's the last time you slept, Jen?"

"Uhm…I'm not sure," she said vaguely. The dizziness was back and she touched her brow, holding her head down until it passed again. It didn't. "I don't feel so good," she told him, as her legs weakened, causing her to stumble.

"You don't look so good, either," replied Gibbs. He lifted her in his arms. "Let's get you upstairs. We can finish this later," he muttered against her brow.

"You don't have to carry me, Jethro. I think I can walk." Her words were airy as if she forced them out by sheer concentration.

"Yeah, well, you don't sound too sure about that. Besides, you weigh next to nothing. What did you do, stop eating too?"

Keeping her head up was proving to be too much of a challenge so she leaned against his shoulder. "No appetite."

He flipped off the lights in the study and headed for the stairs. "Dammit, Jen..."

"Jethro," she interrupted drowsily, "can we please save it for later, when I can defend myself?"

She thought she heard him grumble something about taking care of herself and she would have come up with a sharp retort, if she was able to think clearly. Jenny felt the bed underneath her and sighed in content. Gibbs removed her robe and pulled the covers over her and she uttered something unintelligible as she settled against her pillow. It still felt empty as if something _or someone _was missing. Her head felt heavy as she lifted it. Fighting the nauseating dizziness she spotted him in the doorway, watching her.

"Are you going to join me?"

"Do you want me too?"

What she wanted was for him to stop answering her questions with questions but it was much simpler just to nod. Jenny settled back down against the pillow as she felt the bed dip. His body curved around hers and she wiggled against him, getting comfortable.

"Jethro?"

"Yeah, Jen?"

"I don't want it to be over. I don't want out."

He was quiet for a moment, then said. "Get some sleep, Jen. We'll talk about it later."

Jenny woke to find Jethro standing next to the window, a replication of where she'd stood only hours before staring out into the night. The night had long since disappeared and the sun beamed high in the sky. He glanced at her over his shoulder. Jenny liked to contribute his awareness of her to his sixth sense.

"Hey," he greeted, turning his fully around to face her, hands in his pockets.

"Hi," she said softly. "What time is it?"

"A little after three," he answered. "Guess you needed the rest."

Her eyes snapped to his, wondering at the note in his voice. "Guess I did. No calls?"

Although it was Saturday they were both on-call and it surprised her when Jethro shook his head.

"Nothing worth waking you for," he said evasively.

She narrowed her eyes. "Meaning? Jethro…"

"Nothing important, Jen. I promise," he interrupted.

She gazed at him for a moment before throwing the covers back and reaching for her phone. "I'll just call and check-in…"

"I've got a better idea," He plucked the phone from her fingers. "Why don't you go take a shower, freshen up a bit and I'll fix you something to eat. Go on," he said when she hesitated, "I'll have a cup of coffee waiting for you," He turned and left the room before she could protest.

Jenny gave in to the temptation to roll her eyes at his domineering attitude. She stretched still not feeling all that great but grateful that the dizziness was gone. The hot shower would take care of the rest. She wasn't sure what to expect from Jethro. He'd made no comment about her admission that she didn't want out of their marriage as she slipped into la la land. She'd like to think that the fact that he was still there when she woke was a good sign. But other than showing that he was concerned for her well being, he seemed to be keeping his feelings close to the vest.

She closed her eyes, ducking her head under the hot spray, letting the water wash over her one final time before turning it off. One way or another, this had to end. No matter what the outcome, things were going to be resolved today. Either she'd still be a happily married woman at the end of it, or a woman nursing a broken heart.

As she toweled herself dry and stared at her reflection in the steamed mirror, Jenny hope fervently for the former.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: First and foremost, a big hearty thank you to those who have read/reviewed. I appreciate you taking the time to do so! Also, thank you to those who have waited patiently for this. I know I took a really long time in updating and I apologize, but life and all that stuff. I'm sure you understand...right? Anyway, here it is. I do hope I've done them justice! Enjoy!

Chapter 10

Dressed comfortably in jeans and a sleeveless tee, Jenny padded barefoot down the stairs toward the kitchen. The smell of coffee reached her nostrils and she breathed in deep. Jethro had kept his promise, she thought as she spied two cups of coffee sitting on the counter. He turned as she entered. He lifted the mugs off the counter and handed one to her.

"Umm, thanks," she said gratefully, taking a careful sip of the hot brew.

"No problem," he replied, leaning back against the counter. "Feel better?"

She nodded. "I do. It's amazing what a little sleep and a hot shower can do."

"Yeah," he agreed, raising his drink to his lips, "it is."

Jenny felt the warmth seeped through her body. She wasn't quite sure whether it came from the coffee or the heat in Jethro's gaze as he eyed her.

"Sit," he commanded. "I warmed you up some soup."

"Makes coffee and feeds me too. Amazing." she teased, letting loose a girlish giggle at his stern look. Jenny sat down at the table, not really hungry but unwilling to engage in an argument that admission was sure to create. She could handle the soup.

"Eat," he ordered, not unkindly, as he sat a large bowl of vegetable soup in front of her.

Jenny tried to comply. She picked up the spoon and stirred, blowing softly to cool it she lifted a spoonful to her mouth. And promptly set it back down. She looked up at Jethro who'd taken up his position again leaning against the counter, watching her. She gave him an exasperated look.

"What?" he questioned.

"Jethro, I can't eat with you staring at me like that. Sit down or something. Eat with me. Didn't you make any for yourself?"

"Nope."

"Well, at least sit down."

He sighed but did as she asked, sitting across from her, his eyes intent. She got the feeling he was searching for something and Jenny wasn't sure what he was hoping to find. It was starting to unnerve her a bit the way he watched her as if he expected some grand confession to come pouring out at any moment.

Jenny tried to push those thoughts aside as she stirred her soup once more. She hadn't been lying when she'd told him she didn't have an appetite. Her stomach had been too tied up in knots for her to even consider eating anything. But knowing he was watching did make her at least attempt to get something into her churning stomach, especially since he'd went through the trouble of warming it for her.

The first spoonful went down without incident. So did the next. She realized after several more bites that she was hungrier than she'd thought. It was a nasty habit of hers letting stress get the best of her. Her appetite was usually one of the first things to be affected by it. She was more than halfway through the bowl before she felt full enough to push it away. She reached for a napkin and wiped her mouth.

"When _was _your last meal, Jen?"

She looked over to see him smirking at her. Though the question was asked lightly she could still hear the underlying concern in his voice.

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does matter," he contradicted her. "Whatever's happening with us, Jen, you need to take care of yourself."

"What _is _happening with us, Jethro?" she asked.

Somehow she knew he was stalling, putting off the inevitable conversation they desperately needed to have.

"You never did tell me why you came here last night?"

His eyes shifted downward. "I told you, Jen. I missed you."

She frowned at him. "And that's it? You missed me and now you're back and everything is forgiven?" The last thing she wanted right now was to fight with him but after days of misery she needed more than that.

"What else do you want me to say, Jen?"

Her eyes widened. "Are you serious?" she said rising from the chair, no longer able to keep still. "What else do I want you to say?" She turned on him, her temper flaring. "I want you to say that you believe me, that you made a mistake. I want you to say you trust me again! Or at the very least you could say you were wrong to accuse me of the things you did, since the words 'I'm sorry' have been stricken from your vocabulary."

"I was wrong," he admitted, his voice quiet.

He lifted his blue eyes to her own and she could see the sincerity in them. But it didn't fit. Jethro was not a man who would give up without knowing all the answers. Jenny crossed her arms over her chest and narrowed her eyes at him.

"What aren't you telling me, Jethro? Why are you making this so easy?"

He didn't say anything and Jenny resisted the urge to fill in the silence. He was generally a man of few words and sometimes he just needed a moment to gather his thoughts. She knew this and although she was rapidly losing patience with this whole situation, she gave him his time, choosing to study him instead.

A couple of day's growth covered his face and Jenny doubted that he'd gotten much rest. The bags under his eyes pretty much confirmed that. Knowing him, he'd probably worked on the boat all night, only getting a couple of hours in before starting the day over. She assumed coffee had been his only sustenance too, unless Ducky forced him to eat. She knew the doctor was looking out for both of them, despite his disapproval of the way they were handling things.

Jethro sighed and rubbed his hands over his face and it pained her to see him looking so miserable. She knew he loved her. Neither of them would be hurting this much if they both didn't have deeper feelings involved. They had to get passed this. She didn't want to think about what would happen if they didn't.

The silence stretched to the point where it almost became uncomfortable. Jenny was about to repeat her question, when he spoke.

"I talked to Alan, Jen."

At first the comment confused her, but then she understood. "Senator Alan McAfee? The man you accused me of having an affair with?" she asked aghast.

He nodded.

Jenny leaned against the counter, not sure what to think. Of all things, she never thought Jethro would have confronted the man.

"Why?" she asked puzzled.

He sighed, clasping his fingers tight in front of him. "I needed to know, Jen."

Hurt crossed her face. "And you couldn't come to me?"

"No."

"Oh." Disappointment flooded her. Jenny swallowed hard, not really knowing what to say after that.

"Jen," he began, his voice pleading with her to understand, "every time I looked at you all I could see was the two of you, sitting there together, laughing. It killed me to think about another man coming on to you, touching you."

"So instead you went to Alan and what?" she questioned coldly. "Demanded that he stay away from your wife? Threaten to beat him to a pulp? What? And please tell me you remembered to be discrete in your interrogation of the Senator? Or will I read about it when I open up the newspaper?"

"God, Jen, it wasn't like that."

"Then tell me Jethro, what was it like?" she pushed. "Did he get a chance to explain that his wife was supposed to join us that night? That they were thanking me for keeping her name out of the media when she became involved in a murder case being investigated by one of the other teams? Did you even give him a chance to tell you that his wife was supposed to join us but had to cancel? How about the fact that she insisted we keep the reservations as a thank you to me for clearing her name? The flowers, by the way, were for her but since she couldn't meet us, he passed them on to me. Did you give him a chance to explain any of that, Jethro? Or did you punch first and ask questions later?"

Her voice had gotten louder as she raged at him. Pacing the length of the floor, she was oblivious to the fact that he'd risen from the table and now stood in front of her. He grabbed her arms and held her in place. She struggled against him, trying to escape his hold, her anger too far gone.

"Stop it, Jen! Stop it," he ordered.

She stilled at his harsh tone, her chest heaving from the outburst.

"Let go of me," she spat at him.

"No. Not until you hear me out."

She struggled again but his grip remained firm. "Like you heard me out? Right."

"C'mon Jen. I was furious when I saw the two of you together."

"And instead of coming to me, you drew your own conclusions that had me sleeping with another man, Jethro!"

He pushed her away, striding to the other end of the kitchen. His whole body tense. Jenny took a deep breath. They both had to calm down or this was not going to end well. Looking at him now, watching him work his jaw, she knew they both needed this to end well.

"Jethro, you've seen me alone with men before."

"Not like that…not like that."

His voice was strangled as if the memory of what he saw was more than he could handle. He avoided her gaze; his eyes cast downward, his hands tightened into fists. She jumped when he slammed his fist against the counter, letting out a string of expletives at the pain. She rolled her eyes.

"You know, if you keep doing that, you're going to cause some irreversible damage to your hand."

He snorted. "Heard about that, huh?"

"Yes, I did," she said gathering up some ice and placing it in a cloth. She led him back to the table. "Sit."

She waited for him to get settled before taking his hand in her own and holding the cloth against the broken skin. He hissed but didn't remove his hand.

"I know what you think you saw, Jethro but you're wrong," she began, her voice low, "I'm your wife. I took vows to love you, honor and respect you and to cherish you. That means everything to me. _Everything_. I would not risk losing what you and I have, not for anything."

Their eyes met and held. She prayed he could see the truth of her words in her eyes.

"Then why didn't you tell me, Jen?" He stopped before she could speak. "Not that morning in your office. Before that. I waited for you to come home and explain it to me but you didn't."

"There honestly wasn't time, Jethro," she said earnestly. Setting the ice aside she gripped his hand in her own. "You were on a case, remember? You didn't get back until I was leaving and by then Senator McAfee was there. How was I going to explain to him why I was explaining to my Senior Agent why we were having dinner? As far as he and everyone else were concerned we don't have that type of relationship. And when I got home, you were asleep or at least pretending to be. I went back down to the study to do some work. I never gave it another thought until that morning. By then, you wouldn't let me explain."

"I'd been thinking about it all night; my wife with another man." He shook his head and the anguish in his voice tore at her heart. "By morning, I just couldn't take it. I just wanted…I wanted..."

"To hurt me?" she supplied, gently.

His eyes flashed to hers and then back down at the table.

"Yeah."

"Jethro," she said tenderly taking his chin in her hand and lifting it so that their eyes met. "I understand that. I really do. Had the situation been reversed I might have acted the same as you, maybe not to the same extent," she added. "The fact is we could hash this out until we're blue in the face but what it all boils down to is trust."

She moved closer, cupping the side of his face with her hand.

"I'm your wife. _Yours, _Jethro. And while others may not know that, I do. I love you; I belong to you, mind, body, heart and soul." She took his hand and placed it over her heart, her voice thick with unshed tears. "No man has touched this body, has even made me look twice, since before we married and none ever will as long as I have you. I'll do whatever it takes to prove that to you. Whatever you want me to do, I'll do it. I just need you to trust me. You _have_ to trust me."

He took a haggard breath. "I do, Jen. I do."

He reached over and pulled her into his lap, burying his face in her chest, wrapping his arms tightly around her. She held him back, letting her tears run unchecked down her face, comforting him as he fought for control. She placed kiss on his head feeling for the first time since the whole mess began that they were really going to be alright. After a moment, he raised his head, wiping his eyes with his thumb.

"I've been such a fool. But I was so damn…" he stopped, struggling for the word.

"Jealous?"

"Yeah," he agreed grudgingly.

She smiled, rubbing her hand in his hair. "You shouldn't feel jealous, Jethro. You should take it as a compliment."

"What?"

She chuckled at the confusion on his face. "Let me put it this way, when another man pays attention to your wife, it means you've got something worth paying attention too. It's when they stop paying attention to me that you need to worry."

"You'll always be worth paying attention to Jen, even when you're old and gray."

"Thanks," she frowned, "I think."

She caressed his face, stopping as his brow furrowed.

"What's wrong?"

He looked at her as if debating whether or not he should tell her. He sighed, decision obviously made, he grabbed her hand, blue eyes staring intently into green.

"I don't want to keep our marriage quiet anymore, Jen. I want people to know you belong to me and I belong to you."

She remained silent, thinking as her eyes searched his. "Alright," she acquiesced.

His eyes widened in surprise and Jenny realized he'd expected more resistance to the idea of going public from her.

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"I'm not ashamed of being in love with you, Jethro and I'm proud to be your wife," she told him fondly. "So yes, I'm definitely sure. I think we can handle the consequences."

"I love you, Jen," he said before pulling her head down for a chaste kiss.

One led to another. And then another as the passion flared between them. Their lips met again and again, each kiss lasting a little longer than the last. Their tongues dueled, tasting, teasing as they succumbed to the desire soaring between them. Days without contact had them both feeling more than a little needy; evident by the way he strained against her and the way her nipples pebbled beneath his hand.

"Make love to me, Jethro," she panted in his ear.

And he did; they never left the kitchen.

Several hours later, as darkness fell yet again, Jenny found herself sprawled across Jethro's naked torso, enjoying the feel of him soothingly running his fingers through her hair. After they'd finally made it up to the bedroom, Jethro had found his appetite for her insatiable. Not that she was complaining.

"Jen?"

"Hmmm?" she answered, drowsily.

"I'm sorry."

She smiled, pressing a light kiss to his chest. She readjusted her position, snuggling close against him and drifted off to sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: Since I made you guys wait so long for the final chapter, I thought I would include a little bit more! Yea! This part was just in my head after I posted the last chapter so I figure I'd get it written and posted and have it finally be done. I do hope you guys enjoyed this story. And I thank those of you who will read/review! Enjoy!

Epilogue

Jenny Shepard-Gibbs closed down her computer and grabbed her things, grateful that the day was finally over. She headed towards the door, smiling at the silver-haired man leaning against it waiting for her. She leaned in for a kiss, which he promptly provided, before opening up the door for them to exit.

Jenny had been amazed how quickly things had gotten back on even keel for them. Despite some early morning awkwardness, they'd spent most of Sunday morning in bed. After that, things finally seemed as if they were back to normal, if Jethro groveling could be considered normal. He'd just wanted to make it up to her, he'd said. Jenny wondered if he too knew just how close they'd been to destroying their marriage.

They'd finally made it out of bed in the late afternoon. He'd wanted to see if his team was available to come by the house for a late barbecue. They'd already discussed telling them first and Jenny wondered if his team knew just how high he regarded them. To Jenny's delight none of them had plans that couldn't be broken.

Ziva was the first to arrive and Jenny could tell from the piercing look she gave them that she knew something was up. The rest arrived nearly at the same time and her nerves kicked up a notch. She wasn't afraid they wouldn't approve. She was concern they would feel betrayed because they hadn't been told sooner. Gibbs reassured her everything would be fine; he'd make sure of it.

Tony came in gloating because of course he knew the secret and the rest, aside from Ducky, didn't. Gibbs had to quickly put an end to that, delivering a light-hearted head-slap to the young man. She did see Gibbs pull him aside later but couldn't make out what they were talking about. Obviously it was good because Tony winked at her as he went by, flashing a thumbs-up sign.

The group took the news well. There was a tense silence at first, and then Abby, God Bless Abby, broke the silence with a loud squeal that had everyone covering their ears. It worked to break the tension and for that Jenny was grateful. But then the questions began. After that brutal interrogation, Jenny understood why his team was good at getting confessions; they were relentless. The impromptu celebration went long into the evening and Jenny was well and truly exhausted when the group finally took their leave.

Monday had come around way too quick for her but she got up and dressed simply because she knew she had something to look forward too. Despite how busy her day was, and the fact that Jethro's team had caught a case, he still made time to bring her lunch and made sure she ate it. Jenny was reminded again that it was the little things about their relationship that brought her so much joy.

They made their way down the stairs with Jenny leading the way. Although they had decided to no longer hide their relationship, neither wanted to flaunt it at work. They made small talk waiting for the elevator. Jenny was surprised and a little apprehensive to see Senator Alan McAfee when the doors opened. He stepped off, nodding solemnly to Jethro.

"Agent Gibbs," he acknowledged.

"Senator." Gibbs' tone was dry.

Senator McAfee turned his attention to her, a smile gracing his handsome face.

"Director, I'm glad I caught you. I didn't think I would make it before you left for the evening."

"Hello Senator," she greeted, darting a glance at Jethro. His face was impassive, his eyes trained on the man in front of her. She sighed inwardly. "What can I do for you?"

"I was hoping to invite you out to dinner again," he said and Jenny felt Jethro tense beside her.

"So soon, Senator," she said ever the diplomat, ignoring the death glare Jethro was sending her way. "I would have thought you'd had enough of me."

The Senator laughed, oblivious to the underscores of emotion radiating between the pair.

"My wife felt bad about not being able to join us. She wanted to thank you personally for your help during the investigation," he said lowering his voice. "So I was ordered to extend another invitation and not take no for an answer. This time she swears she'll be there."

"Well, then by all means, I accept," she said graciously. "But I do have one condition."

"Name it."

"The invite would need to include my husband as well."

"Your husband?"

Jenny wanted to laugh. She couldn't tell who was more surprised, the Senator or Jethro. She moved closer to him, taking his hand in her own, linking her fingers through his.

"Yes," she said proudly beaming at him, "my husband."

The Senator stared at their clasped hands before turning to Jethro. Understanding dawned and he nodded. Gibbs dipped his head in acknowledgment. Jenny sensed that something important transpired between the men but she wasn't quite sure what it was.

The Senator approached Jethro and held out his hand. "Congratulations."

"Thanks."

"By the way, I would have done the same thing," Senator McAfee told Jethro ominously as he turned back to Jenny, a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

"Of course, your husband is welcome, Director. My wife would love to meet him," said Senator McAfee. "How about I call your secretary tomorrow to finalize the details?"

"Sounds good."

As the Senator stepped back into the elevator, Jenny once again, Jenny had the distinct impression that she'd missed something. And made a mental note to find out what exactly had Jethro done when they were alone tonight. She turned to him, her confident expression wary.

"Are we okay?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yeah, we're okay Jen."

The elevator dinged signaling its return and he placed his hand on the small of her back as they entered together.

"Besides," Gibbs said, "I kind of like the man."

"Oh great," she muttered, rolling her eyes as the elevator doors slid closed.

The End.


End file.
